2/20/2007

Concerns

I attended the gathering of YAF's in New Jersey this past weekend. I am still processing much of it. However, what is reoccurring in my head right now, it how wicked real adult life is. I am feeling spiritually re-awakened after being away from the Society for nearly six years. But upon returning to Baltimore all I can see and feel are constraints of my current life. It is very clear that I need a new job ASAP. That I need to move out of my living situation...but how broad to I make my search. I have usually been of the mind that I would return home--to Minnesota...but I have fallen in love with Baltimore and perhaps with someone residing here. But should I stay or move on? Do I return to my home and my family and my commitments to them or do I stay with my heart desires? Do I stay to find rewarding work here and see where the path leads with this relationship? The relationship looks like an awful mess from the outside and people wonder why I have not turned my back on it. Much like Baltimore itself looks to many.

I dislike transitioning. It is all I have done for the last six years. Perhaps it will be easier to follow my path now that I am ready to listen again.

3 comments:

Robin M. said...

I like Baltimore too. I have said that if I ever move back to the east coast, I want to live in Baltimore.

Good luck with real adult life.

Elizabeth Bathurst said...

Only the Divine truly knows wether Baltimore and/or Mr. Pre-Dating are right for you: not me, not you, and certainly not random strangers on the internet. Cast your net wide and see where He leads you. Of course, it'd be awesome if you ended up in Boston but I'd rather have you where He wants you.

Take care of yourself,
Elizabeth

Lovin' Life Liz said...

James,
I am not sure if I met you this weekend or not (so many people there)! Just wanted to say I read your post and am holding you in the Light!

Liz